


The Nebmeister

by sansytheskeleton



Series: Neb [2]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, But i'll tag those when the time comes, Chest Binder, F/F, Fluff, Gender Dysphoria, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Many other actual fandoms are referenced in this, Misgendering, Monsterphobia, Nonbinary Character, Other, Private School, Read any warnings that may be in notes before chapters please!, Reader Is Not Frisk (Undertale), Reader has a birth name, Self-Harm, Slow Burn, There will be future trigger warnings but they aren't written yet so I dunno, Transphobia, Unrequited Crush, but beware that there will be death stuff in here, but please be aware that the rating may change in the future, dont u love when authors tag random bullshit that arent tags?, i guess, i'll probably clean up the tags later when i have more chapters, just not of any main characters yknow, misnaming, nonbinary reader, one sided alphys/reader, or like extreme violence i guess but i cant write that shit lmao, rating is teen for now because of cursing, the highest it may go would probably just be mature but i'm not sure yet, this story will be heavy so please read with caution, tho idk what would qualify it for explicit besides the didly do ukno, wrong pronouns
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-04
Updated: 2019-03-04
Packaged: 2019-11-09 06:08:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17996381
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sansytheskeleton/pseuds/sansytheskeleton
Summary: Refined. Rewrite of my previous fanfiction.You're a depressed, lonely, closeted senior in a Christian high school. Your life isn't very exciting and you have very little to look forward to.With monsterphobic parents, how will your life be affected when you meet a shy, sweet lizard monster?Oh, wait! Are those feelings you're developing?! This can't be good!A story about recovery and self-acceptance but also finding friendship and love along the way.(This IS Sans/Reader. There's just a REALLY LONG slow burn! Please make sure to read potential warnings in the beginning notes if applicable. If I have to, I will leave brief descriptions in the endnotes when it comes to heavy stuff.)





	The Nebmeister

**Author's Note:**

> oh my GOD hello yes hi SO I'M REWRITING THIS STORY and the PREVIOUS ONE IS ONLY AVAILABLE FOR REGISTERED USERS TO SEE.  
> don't read the story previous to this if you haven't! it's not good and this story is probably going to be quite different!
> 
> also. i should Note. the reader is more like an OC, and they are nonbinary and go by they/them pronouns! they will be frequently misgendered and misnamed, so please be aware of that!
> 
> edit: i finally have had some sleep and am back to edit! here's a concise list of warnings for this chapter:
> 
> -Homophobia  
> -Misnaming  
> -Misgendering (misgendering of oneself out of fear- I guess internalized transphobia? But not really, I dunno)  
> -References to a bunch of other real fandoms (such as Doctor Who, Life is Strange, The Good Place, Etc.)  
> -Christian school! If reading about a crappy Christian school will trigger or upset you in any way, PLEASE be wary about this fic. As someone who used to attend such a school for the majority of my life, there will be some heavy stuff in this regarding it. The first chapter doesn't have Too Much regarding it, but please, still be careful. ♡  
> -Loneliness  
> -Chest Binding (fretting over appearance? Mild gender dysphoria?)  
> -Reader has a set birth name
> 
> If I missed any tags, please let me know! Thank you!
> 
> Important info that will be relevant throughout the entire story:  
> -A chest binder is something that one may use to make their chest appear flat and/or masculine. Worn by people with breasts, hence the need to flatten.  
> -Dysphoria is the "state of unease or generalized dissatisfaction with life." (Pulled off of Google).  
> -Gender Dysphoria is the feeling that your body and sex does not align with who you feel you are (gender-wise) mentally and emotionally. It can bring extreme discomfort to someone, but the level of it always varies from person to person.  
> -"Social Dysphoria is the sense of dysphoria specifically linked to social situations. It is typically caused by social assumptions relating to gender, such as pronoun use, assumption of social roles or body language." (This is the definition straight from Google).
> 
> If there is anything else that I should add, please let me know!
> 
> I hope you enjoy the story. Thanks for clicking! ♡

_Beep beep beep, beep beep- beep beep beep!_

_Beep beep beep, beep beep- beep beep beep!_

_Beep beep beep-!_

**Smack!**

You blindly groped your nightstand until you located the device that was emanating the foul, repetitive sound. You turned your head with a huff and blearily opened your eyes, your vision blurry as you squinted at your phone and tiredly shut off your alarm. You then let your phone fall back on the stand as you rolled over and squeezed your eyes shut, curling in on yourself and getting cozy once more in the warmth of your bed.

Of course, that could only last so long; it was mere minutes before your shrill alarm was blaring once more and you were quickly reaching out to shut it again. You stayed curled in bed, eyebrows knitted tightly as you tried to fight off the fuzzy yet strong pain of exhaustion in your head.

You had to mentally battle yourself for what felt like ages; you contemplated whether or not you really should get up, whether or not it was worth it to leave your cocoon of warmth. Well, your thoughts were way less concise than that, as they were all over the place and still somewhat in dream land (life didn’t ever quite feel real in the mornings), but the main, burning thoughts in your mind had been whether or not you should get up.

Once your alarm went off for a third time, you merely sighed and reached out to shut it off again, taking slow, deep breaths.

Deciding that you _really_ didn’t want to wake up later to your parents shouting at you to get up, you slowly and reluctantly got up to prepare yourself for another long, draining day of school.

 

To you, the most frustrating things about mornings was how it felt so _impossible_ to actually get up and leave your bed, but once you left the warmth of your bed, it felt significantly easier to move around and get ready. If you could only feel the wakefulness upon actually waking up that you felt when you got out of bed, then perhaps you’d be able to make it to school on time more often. It was too bad that that wasn’t the case, though, and you would much prefer to stay in bed where the warmth was.

Either way, there was no point in mulling such things over; after all, you only had five minutes left to finish getting ready and catch the bus!

You quickly finished off brushing your teeth, spitting out the last bit of water and toothpaste in your mouth before you rinsed off your toothbrush and put it away. You wiped at your mouth with a piece of toilet paper, trashed it, checked your hair, and then exited the bathroom. You adjusted your light gray, Super Mario hoodie as you went, making sure that your chest looked flat- you had opted to wear your chest binder today. It always gave you a boost of confidence when you wore it and it made the day a little more bearable.

After quickly confirming that you had your phone, headphones, phone charger, and water bottles in your backpack’s cup holders, you sat on the couch and struggled to pull on your shoes.

Despite how difficult it always was to put on this particular pair of gray, high top of Vans, you always opted for them as they looked the best on you. You made sure that your navy blue khaki pants were tucked into the sneakers properly.

Once you were satisfied, you stood and slung your backpack over your shoulder, fixated your headphones on your head, and reluctantly headed out of the door into the freezing cold.

You pulled out your phone as you walked down your driveway, one hand reaching up to press a button on the side of your headphones before you tapped a button on the screen of your phone; within seconds, your BlueTooth headphones connected and you were quick to start up your music before shoving your phone back in your pocket along with your hands. A _Panic! at the Disco_ song started playing, but you couldn’t remember the name of it right now, and you didn’t want to subject your hands to the freezing cold once again just to check the name.

Wary of snow and ice, you made sure to maneuver it safely as you walked down the road to the bus stop. You could only see one kid in the distance, but you paid him no mind- in fact, you stared at the sky as you walked, hunched over as you tried to ignore the cold. Your steps aligned with the beat of your music (well, _you_ felt like they did, but in reality, you were walking normally) and you allowed the dark sky to bring you an inner sense of peace.

The only upside about the mornings in the winter was that you got to witness the sky slowly lighting up. Your eyes weren’t brutally assaulted with brightness so early, and you got to wake up with the nature around you. It was incredibly calming.

It wasn’t long until you were stood a few feet away from the other student, your body turned from him as you continued to gaze at the sky as you shivered, but this time your gaze was facing the direction you came from. You always had a better view from this angle- as much as you loved trees, you hated how much they obscured your view of the sky in your neighborhood.

You bounced just a bit where you stood, partially due to the music and partially due to the cold. Thankfully, though, you only had to wait for a few minutes- the bus finally appeared and you sighed quietly in relief as it drove down the street.

You turned your body as it approached, watching the other kid out of the corner of your eye. For some reason, you didn’t like looking at the bus as it came by- you didn’t really want people on there watching you, even if it was unlikely that they were. It was irrational paranoia, but every morning you always did the same thing. Finally, the bus stopped beside you, but the doors were closer to the other kid. You stayed still, allowing him to get on first before you followed suit, pushing one end of your headphones to the side and mostly off of your ear.

“Good morning,” The bus driver greeted, as he did every single morning.

“G’d mornin’,” You said back quietly, just as you always did- it felt rude to simply ignore him, after all. Then, you easily readjusted your headphones.

Walking down the aisle, you stopped once you got to the third row from the front and turned to your right, dropping your bag onto the seat by the window before sitting down and lifting your knees to press against the back of the seat in front of you. You reached behind you and pushed back the annoying seatbelts as you always had to since you could never avoid sitting on them.

Once you were situated and comfortable, you focused on your music as you tried to live in this moment forever, as you did every morning, since you didn’t want to have to get _off_ of the bus and go into school.

Of course, it was always inevitable, as you could not stop or rewind time… much to your dismay.

 

* * *

 

 

“Leviticus 18:22 clearly states _“You shall not lie with a man as with a woman; it is an abomination”_ ,” Your Bible teacher told the class, and you inwardly sighed and hunched forward over the desk as you buckled in for a long forty minute class period. “Now, who would care to explain what this verse means to the rest of the class?” He asked.

You glanced at the other students out of the corner of your eye, wondering if anyone would actually speak up. A moment passed, but then the _‘smart’_ kid rose his hand. Your natural scowl deepened slightly. The kid was called upon by the teacher and you looked away, staring at the wall in boredom and disgust for this horrid place.

“It means that it’s a sin to have intimate relations with someone of the same sex,” The kid spoke up, all professional-like… it made you feel sick.

“Correct! Now-” Your teacher droned on, but you effectively tuned most of it out. After all, it’s not like you wanted to focus on his lecture (especially so early in the morning- it was first period!) about how if any of them were feeling such desires or knew anyone feeling such desires that they needed to repent and ask God for forgiveness, that they couldn’t act on such _horrid, sinful_ desires. That they simply needed to _pray_ and they’d be shown the light. ‘Pray the gay away’, you bitterly thought to yourself.

It took all that you had to not outwardly scoff or get into a pointless fight with your teacher. Honestly, you wanted to- you _desperately_ wanted to, but too bad the anxiety within you silenced you from ever speaking out. Despite how much rage you felt, despite how much you could internally monologue your confident fights and points, when push came to shove, you would never be able to be so confident or speak up on your feelings about such things. The truth is, you would turn into an embarrassed, stuttering mess that couldn’t get your words out. Plus, it would get you in the principal’s office, a phone call home, and a detention. You didn’t really care to go out of your way- you’d be out of here soon enough since it was senior year and there were only a few months left.

 

* * *

 

You peeked into your art classroom- empty, like usual. You pushed open the door and, glancing in the hallway to make sure no teachers were around, you mostly shut the door and flipped off the lights. You then headed to your usual seat, setting your bag on the floor and your lunchbox on the table. You had grabbed it from the main office minutes before coming here, as your dad typically (and thankfully) dropped it off nearly every day as you never had the time to make your own lunch in the morning, and you hated the school lunch (and you had no money for it, anyway).

Sitting down, you put your headphones on, blasted some music, and began to eat your lunch all alone in the small art room as you did a variety of things on your phone. Said variety mostly consisted of texting an internet friend your complaints of the day and reading fanfiction. This was your life… every single day. It’s not like you could sit and eat in the cafeteria, after all- you had no place to go.

You had no friends.

 

* * *

 

 

“Annabelle,” You flinched, blinking and glancing up at your very-unhappy-looking teacher.

“Uh. What?” You found yourself asking as you slowly came back to your surroundings- it was the last period of the day, Chemistry, and you were antsy to leave. You had probably been zoning out for… well, you weren’t sure how long.

“That’s what I thought,” She scoffed in irritation, scowling at you. You gave an apologetic smile.

“Sorry,” You tried to ignore the eyes you felt on you, fighting down the building anxiety. “Won’t happen again,” You lied. This happened so often that your teachers no longer needed to chide you for not paying attention- honestly, a lot of the time they ignored you, but some of your teachers were still adamant on trying to get you to focus.

Your teacher simply sighed and repeated the question, still looking at you. You faltered, the heat rising to your cheeks- it was one thing to talk back to teachers or make stupid jokes in front of the class, but you absolutely hated whenever you had to answer an actual question that was school-related. You already knew you were an idiot, so why did your teachers still try to get you to participate in class? You wondered if this was what it was like in public school or if you’d get to simply doze off in the back without your teacher caring… ugh, what you’d give for that… “Uh, sorry teach, dunno the answer to your question,” You played off despite your rising embarrassment, fighting the urge to look at your classmates.

Your teacher was visibly annoyed, but she simply turned away, thankfully, and allowed someone else to answer the question (that someone else having had their hand in the air the _whole freaking time_ that you were supposed to be answering like the show off they were. Ugh).

At least you got to slide by for the rest of the period until the bell finally rang, indicating your freedom for the night until the next day.

 

* * *

 

 

You pulled your hoodie out of your backpack and tugged it on over your white uniform polo shirt, smoothing it out and making sure you looked sufficiently flat-chested. Since the hoodie wasn’t apart of the school’s uniform, you weren’t allowed to wear it during class. You found it pretty stupid, since it kept you warm, and you really didn’t want to have to spend more money just to buy a _uniform_ fleece or hoodie. Even then, if you _did_ have a school hoodie, you weren’t allowed to wear that during class, either- the hood was the reason for it, even if you didn’t have it up, which was just… utterly ridiculous.

Regardless, you slung your backpack over your shoulder and headed down a few flights of stairs, ready to finally _leave._ Today had been exhausting, but then again, _every day_ was exhausting.

You made sure your headphones were on and that your music was playing before you stepped outside into the cold air. It wasn’t as cold as this morning, but it was still pretty cold, especially since you were only in a hoodie, slacks, and sneakers.

Instead of getting on the bus like you normally did, however, you headed down the sidewalk and to the road.

You’d been wanting to go to the library for some time now, but you kept putting it off. Earlier, though, during lunch, your friend had encouraged you to, basically, _get off your ass_ and go and do that research you kept complaining about wanting to do. They’d managed to weasle you into promising you’d go after school, so here you were, heading to the library. Finally.

Honestly, it filled you with a sense of happiness and almost _giddiness-_ you’d been putting this off for too long, and the prospect of _finally_ doing that research you wanted to do… well, it was exciting, to say the least.

So, despite the cold and the snowy sidewalks and roads, you determinedly headed to the library.

 

_Ding_

The door chimed as you entered, shivering with a verbal cue to how chilly you felt, and you quickly tried to get away from the doors to get warmer. The wind had been somewhat brutal on the walk here and now your face was freezing and your hair was a mess.

Reaching into your pocket, you lowered the volume of your music (you had been blasting it on the walk here and you knew if it was too loud that others would hear it- it was always pretty nerve-wracking whenever you listened to music in public, but you’d managed to figure out what volume to keep it at so others wouldn’t hear it).

You headed to some tables in the back, setting your backpack down and sitting with a sigh- you figured you’d take a minute to warm up. You leaned over the table and closed your eyes, focusing on your music for a minute as you rested.

Eventually, you leaned back and opened your eyes, sighing quietly to yourself. You still felt a bit chilly, but you’d warmed up considerably. You pulled out your phone now that you were sat in the warmth and shot a quick text to your mom to let her know you were at the library and wouldn’t be home at the usual time. Then, after taking a moment to stretch and put your phone back in your pocket, you stood and headed to the section of books that you needed.

You weren’t paying much attention as you passed the aisles- whether it be because of your music, your exhaustion, or the fact that you were staring straight ahead at the section you were determined to get to, you didn’t and wouldn’t know.

So, this led to you yelping when something- _no,_ some _one-_ was suddenly bumping into you, making you jump back- you wobbled, but managed to not fall. You pulled off your headphones and let them drop to hang around your neck, looking up with wide eyes at a yellow, lizard-dinosaur looking monster that was blushing and speaking to you quickly. It took a moment for you to process and tune in to what they were saying.

“-S-sorry- so sorry- are you okay?!” They exclaimed in a high pitched, feminine voice.

You huffed embarrassedly, reaching into your pocket to stop your music. “H-hey, um- I’m fine, yeah, it’s okay, don’t-don’t worry about it,” You offered a weak yet reassuring smile. “You okay?” You asked now that you’d mostly recovered from the stumble and shock of something unexpected happening.

The monster seemed to only get more flustered, gaze darting from side to side as they adjusted their hold on a book and reached up to push their glasses back into place- or, well, they had looked like they were fine, so you assumed it was just a nervous habit. However, the movement drew your gaze to the book in the crook of their arm- your eyes widened slightly in surprise and your smile became a bit more genuine as you looked back up at their face as they rambled their response.

“U-um- yes, I’m-I’m okay, I’m so sorry for bumping i-into you! Are-are you sure you’re alright?” They asked nervously, tilting their head and giving you a concerned, worried look.

For whatever reason, the look had you shifting awkwardly and scratching the back of your head with a nervous laugh as a feeling you couldn’t pinpoint made your chest tighten. “Yeah, really, I’m alright- I should’ve been paying better attention,” You took the blame easily. “I was just, uh… zoned out and headed over there,” You nodded your head in the direction of the aisle you had been walking to. You then glanced at the book in the monster’s arm once more and gave them a small smile. “You’re a fan of _Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children?”_ You asked, tilting your head.

The monster’s eyes seemed to widen a bit more as they glanced down at the book in their arms and then back up to you. “O-oh! Yes, I-I love it! I j-just finished the first book and-and I had to immediately come by to get the second one! I-I know I’m kind of late to the s-series, but… I’m still really l-loving it so far,” They smiled nervously.

You grinned and shrugged. “Hey, being late just means you get to binge it all instead of wait for more to come out,” You pointed out. “I got into the series a long time ago, I remember desperately awaiting each new book,” You hummed fondly. “Though, I still haven’t finished the third book,” You shrugged. “Mostly out of laziness, but also ‘cause I never wanted to finish it ‘cause I didn’t want the story to end,” You admitted. “U-um, but yeah! I’m glad you’re enjoying it,” You shifted on your feet awkwardly before putting all of your weight into one side. “You heard of the movie that came out for the first book?” You asked skeptically.

The monster nodded. “Yeah! I didn’t s-see it, but I’m excited to-to get to watch it. I was a-actually debating if I should watch it before I start the s-second book. Some of my friends said they s-saw the movie and they really e-enjoyed it, so…” They trailed off, seemingly flustered.

“Heh,” Your smile dropped just a bit and you shrugged. “Yeah, uh… I saw the movie with my dad when it came out, and he really loved it, too. But he hadn’t read the book,” You shrugged again. “I don’t mean to ruin your excitement or anything,” You began apologetically. “But fair warning, the movie changed up some of the characters,” You couldn’t keep the bitter tone out of your voice. “It was real dumb how they did that, I was pretty pissed for awhile- I mean, I still am, but,” You shrugged noncommittally. “Despite that, though, the movie itself is pretty good, and honestly, a lot of the places looked exactly how I imagined it in my mind when reading it, so,” You smiled. “I hope you’ll get to enjoy the movie anyway. ...Also, I dunno about the timing that you were saying- maybe to keep the actual book plot in mind, wait to watch the movie until you finish the series, since you already started it?” You tilted your head. You were talking a lot… You shrugged. “That way, y’know, you don’t gotta deal with the, uh… y’know, movies leave a lot out,” You pointed out. “Wouldn’t wanna forget anything going into the next book,” You explained your reasoning.

The monster shifted, but then suddenly nodded. “Y-yeah, I-I think you’re r-right,” They said with a small smile which made your smile widen just a bit more with relief. “I see your p-point. It-it, um… sucks that they m-messed up with the movie?” They tilted their head, then shrugged a bit. “B-but yeah… th-thanks for the heads up and for the advice,” They said sincerely.

You blinked- wow, it really felt like a shock to be met with such genuinity. You weren’t really used to it, especially since most people didn’t like your unsolicited advice… you supposed this time it wasn’t exactly unsolicited, since the monster had expressed their confliction, but still. You laughed a little nervously and shrugged. “It’s, uh. It’s no problem,” You said a bit distractedly, then gave another small, almost apologetic smile. “Thanks for takin’ the time to listen to me ramble, I guess,” You shrugged.

“O-oh! That’s-that’s no problem! I-I ramble all of th-the time, a-anyway, so-so I totally g-get where you’re coming from! D-don’t- don’t, um, worry about it!” They reassured enthusiastically and you flushed a bit, scratching the back of your head nervously again.

“H-heh… thanks. You’re really kind,” You smiled genuinely. “May I, uh, ask for your name? And- um- are you a she, or…? I mean, like- y’know- um,” You stammered, face heating up a bit more as you shifted awkwardly. “S-sorry, um, I just don’t want to a-assume,” You shrugged stiffly.

“I-it’s okay!” The monster reassured again, pushing their glasses up once more. “I-I appreciate you asking. I-I do go by she, and-and my name’s Al-Alphys! What-what about you?” She asked, tilting her head with a kind, nervous smile.

You huffed a bit, unable to not return the smile, but then you faltered at the question and realized you really hadn’t thought this through. Of course she’d ask for your name in return. Dang it, you were such an idiot-! “U-um,” You stammered, a sheepish, embarrassed expression as you looked away. What name could you even give? You didn’t want to give your birth name to a stranger- this would be your only chance to give a name _other_ than your birth name!- but you also didn’t exactly… have a set chosen name. You’d always had trouble with deciding, and since you couldn’t exactly have people around you call you by a chosen name… it was hard to tell if anything would ever fit properly. “...N...Neb?” You suddenly blurted, face hot. “Um, Neb,” You said with a bit more fake confidence. “It’s, uh, nice to meet you, Alphys,” You flashed a nervous smile, shifting where you stood.

“I-it’s nice to meet you too, Neb!” She said kindly and your heart fluttered at hearing someone call you a name other than your birth name. “What about you? What are your pronouns?” She asked.

You faltered. The way she asked that… you almost felt like you could be honest, that you could _come out_ to this stranger, but… no, it was too intimidating, the only people you were out to were online friends, and- “Sh-she,” You stammered out the lie, glancing away. Your heart hammered in your chest. “U-um… sorry, I’m-I’m probably keeping you from-from… something, aren’t I?” You found yourself saying, taking a step back so she’d be able to get by if she needed to. “Sorry.”

Alphys shook her head. “No, you’re f-fine! It’s o-okay, really,” She promised. “I-I was just here to, um. To check out this book. A-and I’m kind of t-trying to avoid going back to a crowded area with my f-friends, h-heh…” She admitted sheepishly.

You paused at that, tilting your head. “Oh? What, like a party?” You found yourself unable to resist asking.

“Umm. No, it’s- it’s this… school event thingy a friend of ours is having,” She shrugged. “Like… a fair. B-but there were so many people around a-and- and I saw that the library was nearby, so I f-figured I’d take a p-pit stop, and… yeah,” She shrugged again, pushing her glasses further up her snout. “E-especially since the first little while is just m-meant to be… y-y’know, the social gathering part. I-I still have time before the, uh. The main thing,” She explained.

You nodded slowly. “...So, you’re hiding out here,” You said. She seemed to flush but nodded nervously. You chuckled and shrugged. “Hey, I’d do the same thing. I hate crowded places. Too many people,” You said with a scrunch of your nose.

Alphys laughed softly and nodded. “Y-yeah, I agree,” She said, then trailed off a bit.

You could feel the conversation coming to a close, but, dang it…! This monster seemed really nice, you didn’t really want it to end right here… “S-so-! Um, how much time y’got?” You asked. “‘Til ya gotta head back?” You tilted your head.

Alphys faltered for a moment before pulling out a phone and checking the time. Then, she shrugged. “Like… an hour, actually,” She informed you.

You were quiet for a moment in thought. “Oh, that’s-that’s quite a while. ...Y’know- um. I mean. Do you- uh. Wouldja wanna... hang with me ‘til ya gotta go? That way you don’t gotta awkwardly stand around as you wait for time to pass,” You suggested a bit lamely- it was a pretty poor excuse, considering you just wanted her to stay and chat. “Y’know, avoid the, um… crowd, and-and the… I mean, it’s a long wait. U-um. B-but yeah, I-I, uh, I was just gonna go grab some books about the early 1900s,” You shrugged. “But yeah, if ya wanna you can join me back at my table…? It’s fine if not,” You hurriedly said.

“O-oh… I-I’d, um, I’d l-love to! Th-thank you, you’re really k-kind to o-offer,” She said, making you flush and look away sheepishly.

“O-oh- um. Pff… th-thanks? U-uh,” You stammered, then shrugged. “A-anyway, um- my- the table I was, uh, sitting at, it’s, uh, that one,” You turned and pointed to it. “Where the b-backpack on the floor is,” You told her. “If ya wanna go sit, I’ll be right back, j-just right after I grab the book or books I need,” You suggested.

“O-oh, yeah, s-sure! I’ll-I’ll meet you over there,” She said with a nervous smile that you returned.

Then, she headed for the table and you let out a long, quiet, heavy sigh. Wow, you were really bad at socializing. Shaking your head to yourself and taking the next few minutes to regain your bearings, you headed to the realistic fiction and quickly chose a couple of books that looked promising and would hopefully help you with accuracy about details of the past. The break from talking allowed you to calm down from the awkwardness you had felt.

Finally, you headed back over to Alphys, a few books in hand. You gently placed them on the table before sitting down and giving Alphys a small smile. “Heya,” You greeted.

“Hi,” She said back, a smile on her face as well. She glanced down at the books, then back up at you, readjusting her glasses. “Are you reading those for fun?” She asked.

You laughed and shrugged. “I mean, sort of? Not entirely. I, uh… I’m actually… working on a film project- a personal film project, anyway,” You embarrassedly explained. “And it’s supposed to take place sometime in the early 1900s. I’m not entirely sure when _exactly_ I want it to take place yet, but either way, I wanna, like, y’know… get the history as accurate as I can for this kinda project,” You shrugged a bit.

Alphys’s eyes seemed to brighten. “O-oh! That’s super cool! Y-you’re into film?!” She asked, and you faltered before smiling sheepishly and shrugging.

“Um, yeah, it’s-it’s tons of fun for me,” You admitted. “The editing is the best part, ‘cause I love doing all that work to get a beautiful end product,” You shrugged. “B-but yeah, film is awesome. I’m just really lazy and it, uh… it takes a while for me to actually get anything done,” You huffed and fiddled with the popsocket on your phone in your pocket. “I had a friend convince me to finally come down to the library today, s-so, uh… yeah,” You pulled the chair a bit closer to the table and leaned on your elbows. “Here I am, I guess,” You laughed a bit awkwardly with a shrug.

“W-well- that’s super cool either way,” She shrugged. “I have a friend that’s, um… into film, but he likes being in front of the camera,” She glanced away, eyes narrowed slightly before she looked back at you. “What’s-what’s your film gonna be about? If-if it’s okay to a-ask, anyway,” She stammered.

“It’s, uh. It’s fine,” You reassured, then shrugged slowly, glancing away awkwardly. “Erm… it’s… y’know, I… I don’t really have a full story planned out, I-I just have a, uh… general idea? But… uhhh,” You didn’t want to sound like a jerk, dang it, but you didn’t really want to talk about your idea. “I dunno, it’s kinda angsty and… controversial,” You hinted, hoping she wouldn’t ask for more details.

“O-oh, that’s… that’s alright. Um…” She trailed off, looking away, an awkward silence settling over the two of you.

Dammit, this was such a bad idea. What possessed you to think you could try and become friends with this random stranger? Stupid, stupid, stupid… “U-um… are you into any, um, fandoms?” You blurted. It was always your ‘go-to’ question when you were trying to bond with someone. ...You are such a nerd.

“Oh! Yeah!” Her expression brightened, causing you to relax just a bit in turn. “I-I love a ton of things, um…”

Honestly, you hadn’t been expecting the sudden tsunami of words from Alphys- she’d asked if you liked anime, and when you shrugged and said you’d seen a few things, she immediately began to ramble about some of her favorite animes and reasons why you should watch it. It sounded like she was spoiling everything, but she was talking so fast that you could hardly catch on to what she was saying anyway- besides, you found yourself simply grinning brightly as she word-vomited about her favorite things even if you had no idea what she was talking about.

“...O-oh my gosh, I-I’m so sorry! I… I didn’t mean to r-ramble so-so much, um, uh…” She gave you an apologetic look, clicking her claws together nervously. “What-what are _you_ into?”

You hadn’t stopped grinning. You shrugged. “Oh, uh, I dunno. Buncha things. And, just wanna say, it’s fine to ramble. It doesn’t bother me,” You reassured, heart doing flips when you saw her visibly relax. Your smile brightened just a bit. “Anyway, I’m into a ton of things. I’m afraid I don’t know a lot about anime, but that’s just… ‘cause I never knew where to look,” You admitted with a shrug. “And I’m lazy, so y’know. But I’m really into shows like, uhh… Brooklyn Nine-Nine, The Good Place… Doctor Who, Sherlock, Supernatural…” You listed off, shrugging. “Comedies and sci-fi. That’s, pff, basically all I watch. That, plus YouTubers’, and, uhh? And I’m into a bunch of video games,” You rambled, face heating up. “Uh, but. Yeah?” You tilted your head awkwardly.

“O-oh! I have a friend that just got into Doctor Who a while ago and, pff, he’s been binging the heck out of it!” She exclaimed, a grin on her face. “He says it’s awesome and he loves all the, uhm… he said there’s a lot of time travel and stuff?” You nodded to confirm. “Y-yeah, he’s a big nerd for that kinda thing. I am, too! I just-I just haven’t gotten into it- I mean, I haven’t started Doctor Who, so I just… yeah,” She shrugged embarrassedly.

You laughed softly. “Yeah, it’s fine. Doctor Who is really freakin’ long. You gotta be ready to sit down and binge the crap out of it if you wanna get into it. And that’s still true even if you only watch ‘New Who’ instead of ‘Old Who’,” You said, and at her confused expression, you snorted and waved your hand in the air. “Oh, the show’s been around for, like, over fifty years. So it’s been cut into sections or whatever of the _old_ series and the _new_ series. I never could watch the old series ‘cause, uhh… I dunno, I didn’t like the black and white, and… I found it kinda cringey?” You admitted with a shrug. “I have massive respect for it, though, of course. But yeah. New Who is great, but there’s still tons of seasons and content to watch. D’ya know how much your friend’s binged?” You asked.

“Umm… no idea. I just know he’s been watching it nonstop for, like, the past month? He loves it, though. He hates when he isn’t watching it- pfft, like right now!” She said with a snort, smirking. “He’s with the others at the, um, the school, right now, and I would bet money that he’s bitter about being unable to watch the show,” She laughed.

You grinned. “He sounds great. I respect all binge watchers,” You said with mock-wisdom, nodding your head firmly. Then, you snorted. “Well, anyway. You should totally get into the show sometime! If you like sci-fi, I think you’d really enjoy it. I’d even say that it’s got… similar vibes to Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children?” You said, thinking it over, then nodding. “Yeah, sorta. Time travel stuff, aliens- or, uh, people that’re different or have powers, y’know? And, like, just…” You trailed off in thought, unsure how to articulate all of your reasons for their similarities. After a moment, though, you snorted. “Oh, actually, the book even quotes Doctor Who,” You suddenly remembered with a grin. “I remember losing my crap when I was reading the book and it quoted Doctor Who. I was so happy, pfft,” You shrugged, still grinning.

“O-oh! I guess I m-missed that, if-if it was in the first book,” You nodded to confirm. “I guess I should watch it,” She agreed, mostly to herself. Then, she nodded. “I’ll try and make time for it,” She decided and your grin brightened in victory.

“Heck yeah! I’m sure you’ll love it,” You really hoped that she would actually start it someday.

“Yeah, hopefully,” She said, and then silence fell over the both of you once more.

You faltered for a long moment before shifting and glancing at the books on the table beside you absentmindedly, trying to think of a way to continue the conversation. “Uhhhh. Y’know,” You began, glancing up at her. “It’s only fair if I promise to watch something you like, huh?” You said. “Whatcha think about, uh, writing down some fandoms or whatever- like, you can write down some animes you love that you want me to watch. And. And then I could find it and watch it later,” You awkwardly explained, probably poorly getting your point across. “I-I got some paper in my backpack. I need some new things to w-watch, anyway. Wanna give me some, uhhh… recommendations? And if ya want, I can give ya some in return,” You shrugged.

“O-oh! Sure!” Alphys exclaimed, and when you began to reach for your backpack, she hesitantly spoke up again. “U-um- actually, do-do you think it… might be easier if… if we wrote it in our phones? Or, like… texted each other the recs?” She asked nervously, tilting her head and pushing her glasses back into place.

You smiled a bit at the nervous habit that she seemed to do a lot, but then faltered when you realized she was asking for your phone number. Your eyes widened slightly, your heart doing a few flips before your grin brightened sheepishly. “O-oh! Oh, um- yeah, I mean, if you want-! Um, yeah?” You laughed nervously, tugging your phone out of your pocket. “T-totally. What’s your, uhhh… number?” You asked awkwardly.

Alphys rattled off a phone number and you quickly typed it in before repeating the numbers back to her. When she confirmed it, you sent her a text.

 

 _You: **3:32PM**_  
heyo, it’s neb, the nerdy weirdo you met at the library!

 

“There, sent ya a message,” You hummed as you pocketed your phone, watching as she pulled out her own phone. You watched her type something in and, when you didn’t feel a buzz, you figured she was giving you a contact name. You’d just put in ‘alphys’ since you didn’t know what kind of nickname you could put.

She pocketed her phone and grinned up at you. “N-nice! U-um, and you’re not a weirdo!” She huffed and you laughed a bit, shrugging noncommittally.

“Pff, sorry. Couldn’t help myself,” You smirked.

Alphys rolled her eyes, but she was still smiling. “A-anyway, I can send you a l-list later, if that’s okay,” She suggested and you nodded. “C-cool. So… what kinda video games are you into?” She asked.

You were relieved that she came up with another topic. You grinned and pointed to your hoodie. “Mario, for one,” You shrugged, leaning forward again. “I adore all Mario games. They’re the best. I dunno. Ya ever heard of Life is Strange-?”

Alphys suddenly squealed, her eyes widening as she covered her mouth. The reaction made your own eyes widen a tad before a lopsided smile tugged at your lips and you laughed quietly. “I-I have! I-I, um,” She seemed to struggle with quieting her voice. You couldn’t help but smirk. She was totally a nerd- it was great. “I binged the wh-whole thing within a few days! A-and-and I also p-played the second one, have-have you?” She asked. You nodded.

“Yeah, I can’t wait for the rest of the episodes to come out,” You said, still grinning.

“Y-yeah! Same! I- ugh, I was so upset when-when-!” She began to ramble about some things (that would be massive spoilers for anyone that hadn’t played it) from the game that were upsetting that you wholeheartedly agreed with. “A- _anyway-_ um. Y-yeah, I’m s-super… super excited to see where the rest of the game goes,” She shrugged, a blush on her face. Your grin was plastered on your face- you didn’t think you could stop smiling at this point. “B-but anyway… the first game,” She finally backtracked to your initial question. You snorted and nodded. “I l-loved it. And the-the prequel thing! Before the Storm,” She said.

“Oh, yeah, it’s amazing. It killed me over and over, pretty sure I screamed and cried a ton,” You shrugged. “All of it has killed me thus far, honestly. I _love_ Chloe with my whole heart. Best character, hands down,” You snorted. “And Rachel is just frickin’ fantastic,” You said, then paused, watching Alphys for a moment. “...Do you, uh… ship any of the characters-?” You asked hesitantly, but watched as Alphys’s eyes lit up.

“Y-yeah! Chloe and Rachel are _so cute_ t-together! But Chloe and Max are also a-adorable, I-I just can’t decide!” She admitted, much to your surprise.

Your smile brightened. “...Yeah, um. ...Same here. They’re… they’re so gay, right?” You spoke hesitantly. Alphys seemed… pretty open-minded, right…? You rarely got to talk to anyone about this kind of stuff.

“Hell yeah!” She exclaimed, then blushed, hunching in on herself and quieting down. “S-so gay. Mega gay. I love them,” She grinned embarrassedly.

You laughed and nodded. “Yeah, uh. Me too,” You relaxed significantly.

...Alphys was… pretty fucking awesome, honestly. You couldn’t have been more happy for a stranger to bump into you.

 

The rest of the time passed as the two of you rambled about gay ships and other nerdy things, but as much as the two of you got along, you didn’t actually have _that many_ fandoms in common. Which was honestly a bummer- you kind of desperately wanted to fix that. Talking to her was absolutely amazing and it would be so much better if you could share her enthusiasm with her anime. Regardless, the conversation thankfully didn’t have too many awkward moments or pauses- the time flew as the both of you chatted and laughed together, struggling to keep your voices down since you were in a library and didn’t want to get kicked out for being too loud.

Your time together came to an end too quickly, you decided, when Alphys was suddenly checking the time and her eyes seemed to bug out. “O-oh no! I- oh, I’m so sorry,” She looked up at you apologetically. “I have to g-go! I’m g-gonna be late, oh…” She began to stand. “I-I’m sorry to cut this sh-short! But-but it was, um, it was g-great talking to y-you! Um, b-but yeah, sorry-”

“It’s all good, don’t worry about it, Alphys,” You reassured kindly with a smile. “Thanks for talkin’ with me, I had fun. Text me later?” You asked nervously, tilting your head.

Alphys quickly nodded. “Of-of course!” She promised.

You grinned. “Awesome. Now, go on! Get outta here, ya don’t wanna be too late. See ya!”

With that, Alphys said farewell once more and scurried out of the library. You watched her go, the happy grin still on your face as you leaned on your hand, elbow propped on the table. You sighed softly, content, heart warm.

…

You blinked, dropping your arm and flushing as you shook your head, glancing down at your books. You ignored the way your heart fluttered and opened a book, preparing to consume yourself in research. You absolutely did not get sidetracked repeatedly by thinking about Alphys.

...Absolutely not.

**Author's Note:**

> THANKS SO MUCH FOR READING  
> I REALLY APPRECIATE IT  
> PLEASE COMMENT YOUR THOUGHTS! I LOVE FEEDBACK! IT ENCOURAGES ME TO CONTINUE WRITING AND TO IMPROVE, TOO! THANKS SO MUCH! ♡♡♡♡♡
> 
> and again, please please let me know if there are any mistakes or any tags i should add! the last thing i want to do is upset someone due to poorly tagging! of course, the warnings are there that this story is going to be heavy, but i still want to make sure to tag anything and everything i can!  
> thanks again! ♡  
> oh, also, pop on over to my [Tumblr](https://sansytheskeleton-ao3.tumblr.com/) if you want or need anything at all! i may not be the best at responding immediately, but i will check periodically! ♡  
> [Tumblr](https://sansytheskeleton-ao3.tumblr.com/)


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